Smart Choices - Neither Smart nor Much of a Choice

It was a short-lived attempt at offering some kind of "one-stop" shopping - an easily-identifiable logo to be slapped upon grocery items, meant to reassure the harried consumer that the carefully packaged food within was not only safe but good for the body and soul, a healthy choice amidst so much trans-fats and artificial preservatives. Called "Smart Choices" and featuring the trendy color green, the logo sought to cut through the dizzying array of unregulated front-of-package nutrition signs that can make working the aisles of the local supermarket as wearying a task as braving the red tape of the DMV. How many variations on the words / phrases "smart," "sensible," and "healthy" could there be, after all? With such confusion relegated to the past, shoppers need only keep one eye open for the friendly green check mark and the "Smart Choices" brand to help decide between calorie-loaded processed food and the good stuff that makes one healthy, wealthy and wise.

Except, something went wrong along the way. For if the program was meant to direct people towards healthy food items (either healthy or, and this is parsing things a bit, the ambiguous "healthful" designation), wary consumers and nutrition groups quickly realized that the "Smart Choices" label was being randomly slapped onto any old box or container of artificial sludge and sugar-steepened rot that fills up most aisles in any respectable grocery store. Outrage and ridicule spread across the Internet as bloggers and advocacy groups reported on some of the inanities sporting the healthy green label - Froot Loops, Coco Crispies, boxes of Cracker Jack, Fudgsicles and jars of Hellman's Mayonaise and Peter Pan Peanut Butter. Of course, one need merely scan these and other "healthy" items to note that there was nothing random at all in the designation - all represent food items designed, packaged and distributed by the giants of the corporate food industry, such as ConAgra, General Mills, Kraft, PepsiCo and Tyson. Furthermore, a little investigating reveals that the "Smart Choices" sticker is not simply awarded to those food items which are positioned at the top of the dietary chain. Rather, as the folks at Sincerely Sustainable point out, "the main prerequisite for inclusion into the program is $100,000 per year paid by the companies who produce the foods seeking inclusion". Hence the presence of such nutrient-rich and life-sustaining food items as Froot Loops and mayonnaise.

When pressed on such matters, Tufts researcher and Smart Choices board member Ellen T. Kennedy noted that sugar cereals such as Froot Loops and Coco Crispies were given the Smart Choices nod because they were better choices than donuts. On this matter, Ms. Kennedy may very well be correct. As a matter of fact, aside from spoonfuls of lard stuffed with egg yolks and deep fried, I can't think of many food items that would not be considered better for one than donuts. As the chatter concerning inappropriate food concoctions suddenly deemed healthful rose to a fever pitch, the chagrined FDA stepped in, firing off a mildly accusatory letter to the program, and it was shortly thereafter that Smart Choices made the announcement that they were voluntarily suspending the program (or "postponing active operations," as no doubt their legal representation suggested). The boxes of Froot Loops festooned with green check marks would remain on the shelves, but no further releases would be forthcoming. The FDA is said to have begun some sort of investigation into how products consisting of over 50% sugar ever achieved the green stamp of approval.

This entire debacle should not come as a surprise if one is aware of the almost complete dominance of ConAgra, Kraft, Tyson and others in the global food industry. Many of these companies long ago ceased selling food and began pushing the mantra of processed goods. Truth be known, these businesses have little to no interest in steering American diets away from preservatives, sugars, and artificial ingredients, because these unhealthy and unnatural elements are their very life blood. The author Michael Pollan has pointed out that large agribusinesses shield themselves from accusations of contributing to the nation's obesity epidemic by appearing to support healthy eating and dietary changes. These corporations don't recommend what nearly any dietitian or nutritionist knows, however, which is that diets rich in plants and low in meats, oils and additives are best. Instead, Pollan argues, agribusinesses throw vocal support behind trendy diets and fads that focus upon one or two specific "macronutrients". One can rattle off such high-profile Oprah-approved dietary movements, from low-carb and low-fat to gluten-free and Master Cleanse detox diets. What all these diets have in common is the disturbing notion that the key to healthy eating is to identify one specific bad dietary agent and remove it from one's diet. Of course, nothing in any of these fads and trends need keep any practitioner from continuing to purchase the processed products that glut both our nation's supermarket aisles and our waistlines. Any true movement towards healthy eating would necessarily involve completely shutting out the entire output of such agribusiness organizations as ConAgra and Kraft.

I went about compiling some of my favorite examples of the Bizarro World Smart Choices selections. Aside from the aforementioned sugar cereals, I came across such staples of naturally balanced diets as Kraft's Strawberry Bagel-Fuls, Ritz Bits Peanut Butter Chocolatey Blast Crackers, Fruit Roll-Ups Crazy Pix, Chocolate Teddy Grahams and "Healthy Choice" Beef Tips and Portobello TV Dinners. While many commentators have chosen to focus on the often outrageous amounts of sugar present in such supposedly healthy choices, I've been more closely examining the total ingredients present in some of the designated foods, specifically those aimed at children. While the notion of something like Froot Loops being healthy in any way, shape or form is transparently ludicrous, the branding of children-marketed TV Dinners as "Smart Choices" is even more insidious.

I followed the appropriate links to the nutritional and ingredient information on several products deemed "Smart Choices," and before growing mildly nauseous while attempting to navigate the garishly-colored and cartoon-character infested world of products like "Cowboy KC's Ham and Cheese Ropers," I was continually astonished at both what passed for healthy eating and what passed for food full stop. The Kid Cuisine "Twist and Twirl Spag and Meatballs" TV dinner, aside from committing a crime against humanity by using the word "spag" for "spaghetti," contains 430 calories per serving, including 120 from fat, 15% of one's daily saturated fat, 10% cholesterol and almost 30% of one's daily sodium. But I was more impressed with the complete list of ingredients -

INGREDIENTS:SPAGHETTI AND MEATBALLS AND SAUCE: SPAGHETTI (DURUM SEMOLINA ENRICHED WITH [NIACIN, FERROUS SULFATE {IRON}, THIAMINE MONONITRATE, RIBOFLAVIN, FOLIC ACID], EGG WHITES), WATER, COOKED MEATBALLS, CARAMEL COLOR ADDED: BEEF, WATER, ISOLATED SOY PROTEIN, RICOTTA CHEESE (WHEY, PASTEURIZED WHOLE MILK, SALT, VINEGAR), ROMANO CHEESE (PASTEURIZED COW'S MILK, CHEESE CULTURES, SALT, ENZYMES), DRIED EGG WHITE, SALT, SPICES, GARLIC POWDER, PARSLEY, FLAVORINGS, CARAMEL COLOR, BROWN SUGAR, WHEAT FLOUR. TOMATO PASTE, CONTAINS 2% OR LESS OF EACH OF THE FOLLOWING: BEEF FLAVOR (CONTAINS BEEF EXTRACT, YEAST EXTRACT, SALT, MALTODEXTRIN, FLAVOR, LACTIC ACID, CITRIC ACID), SOYBEAN OIL, SEASONING (SUGAR, SALT, DEHYDRATED ONION AND GARLIC, LOCUST BEAN GUM, SPICES, DISODIUM INOSINATE AND DISODIUM GUANYLATE, AND NATURAL FLAVOR), ROMANO CHEESE MADE FROM COW'S MILK (PART-SKIM MILK, CHEESE CULTURE, SALT, ENZYMES). CORN WITH WATER, SUGAR. BROWNIE: SUGAR, ENRICHED WHEAT FLOUR (CONTAINS NIACIN, REDUCED IRON, THIAMINE MONONITRATE, RIBOFLAVIN, FOLIC ACID, ASCORBIC ACID (A DOUGH CONDITIONER), CANOLA OIL, WATER, EGGS, HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP, COCOA POWDER PROCESSED WITH ALKALI, CONTAINS 2% OR LESS OF: DEHYDRATED APPLE, PEAR, AND PLUM, CORN SYRUP SOLIDS, MONO- AND DIGLYCERIDES, SALT, SOY LECITHIN, CELLULOSE GUM, NATURAL AND ARTIFICIAL FLAVORS. PARMESAN CHEESE PACKET: PASTEURIZED MILK, SALT, CHEESE CULTURE, ENZYMES, CELLULOSE POWDER (PREVENTS CAKING), SORBIC ACID (PRESERVATIVE).

I then checked out the ingredients for another Kid Cuisine offering, this one the "Magical Cheese Stuffed Crust Cheese Pizza," also designated a "Smart Choice" option -

INGREDIENTS:STUFFED CRUST CHEESE PIZZA: CRUST (FLOUR BLEND [ENRICHED WHEAT FLOUR {BLEACHED WHEAT FLOUR, BARLEY FLOUR, NIACIN, REDUCED IRON, THIAMINE MONONITRATE, RIBOFLAVIN, FOLIC ACID}, WHOLE WHEAT FLOUR, SOY FLOUR], WATER, DEXTROSE, WHEAT GLUTEN, SOYBEAN OIL, BAKING POWDER [SODIUM BICARBONATE, SODIUM ALUMINUM SULFATE, CORN STARCH, MONOCALCIUM PHOSPHATE, CALCIUM SULFATE], SALT, YEAST [YEAST, STARCH, SORBITAN MONOSTEARATE, CITRIC ACID], DOUGH CONDITIONER [WHEAT FLOUR, SALT, SOY OIL, L-CYSTEINE, ASCORBIC ACID, ENZYMES], ASCORBIC ACID TAB [ASCORBIC ACID AND OTHER EXCIPIENTS]), RESTRICTED MELT MOZZARELLA CHEESE (PART-SKIM MOZZARELLA CHEESE [PASTEURIZED MILK, SALT, ENZYMES], MODIFIED FOOD STARCH, METHYLCELLULOSE), FAT REDUCED MOZZARELLA CHEESE (PASTEURIZED PART-SKIM MILK CHEESE [PASTEURIZED MILK, CULTURES, SALT, ENZYMES, SMOKE FLAVORING]), MOZZARELLA CHEESE (PASTEURIZED PART-SKIM MILK, CHEESE CULTURES, SALT, ENZYMES), SAUCE (WATER, TOMATO PASTE, PIZZA SAUCE SEASONING [SALT, SUGAR, ONION POWDER, SPICES, XANTHAN AND GUAR GUM, GARLIC POWDER, POTASSIUM SORBATE, CITRIC ACID, CONTAINS 2% OR LESS OF: TRICALCIUM PHOSPHATE, SOYBEAN OIL {ADDED AS PROCESSING AIDS}], MODIFIED FOOD STARCH), RELEASING AGENT (WATER, MONO- AND DIGLYCERIDES, POLYSORBATE 60, SOY LECITHIN, ACETIC ACID, CITRIC ACID, POTASSIUM SORBATE, PROPYL GALLATE, SODIUM BENZOATE, POLYDIMETHYLSILOXANE), CELLULOSE, SOYBEAN OIL. CORN WITH WATER, SUGAR. VANILLA PUDDING: WATER, SUGAR, CORN SYRUP SOLIDS, SOYBEAN OIL, WHEY PROTEIN CONCENTRATE, DRIED SWEET CREAM (SWEET CREAM, NONFAT MILK, SODIUM CASEINATE), MODIFIED CORN STARCH, ACETIC ACID ESTERS OF MONO- AND DIGLYCERIDES WITH MALTODEXTRIN, CREAMY VANILLA FLAVOR (WATER, PROPYLENE GLYCOL, ARTIFICIAL FLAVORS, ALCOHOL, NATURAL FLAVORS, CARAMEL COLOR), SALT, XANTHAN GUM, SOY LECITHIN (NONFAT MILK, SOY LECITHIN, PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED SOYBEAN OIL), ANNATTO COLOR (REFINED SOYBEAN OIL, ANNATTO EXTRACT, MONO- AND DIGLYCERIDES). SPRINKLE PACKET: DEXTROSE, SUGAR, RICE FLOUR, NATURAL AND ARTIFICIAL FLAVOR, COCOA (COCOA PROCESSED WITH ALKALI), MALTODEXTRIN, PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED VEGETABLE OIL (COTTONSEED, SOYBEAN), CORN STARCH, FD&C RED #40, FD&C YELLOW #6, CELLULOSE GUM, CARRAGEENAN, FD&C BLUE #1, SOYA LECITHIN, CONFECTIONER'S GLAZE, SUCRALOSE, FD&C BLUE #2 LAKE, GUM TRAGACANTH, FD&C YELLOW #5, GUM ARABIC.

Fun, isn't it? But my favorite example of what the processed food corporations have wrought upon the American table came from the staggering list of ingredients included inside the single-serving Lunchables Chicken Dunks box :

Ingredients: WATER: NATURAL SPRING WATER. BREADED WHITE CHICKEN STRIPS (CHICKEN STRIPS: WHITE CHICKEN, WATER, MODIFIED CORN STARCH, POTASSIUM LACTATE, CONTAINS LESS THAN 2% OF SALT, POTASSIUM CHLORIDE, DEXTROSE, SODIUM PHOSPHATES, CARRAGEENAN, SODIUM DIACETATE, LEMON JUICE SOLIDS, FLAVOR. BATTER; WATER, BLEACHED WHEAT FLOUR, MODIFIED FOOD STARCH, YELLOW CORN FLOUR, DEXTROSE, SPICES, GARLIC POWDER, EXTRACTIVES OF PAPRIKA, MONOSODIUM GLUTAMATE, CARAMEL COLOR. BREADING: WHEAT FLOUR, YELLOW CORN FLOUR, MODIFIED FOOD STARCH, EGG WHITES, WHEAT GLUTEN, DEXTROSE, SPICES, WHEY [FROM MILK], SALT, PAPRIKA, ONION POWDER, NATURAL FLAVOR. SEASONING: ENRICHED BLEACHED WHEAT FLOUR [BLEACHED WHEAT FLOUR, MALTED BARLEY FLOUR, NIACIN, REDUCED IRON, THIAMINE MONONITRATE, RIBOFLAVIN, FOLIC ACID], EGG WHITES, MODIFIED FOOD STARCH, SALT, GARLIC POWDER, ONION POWDER, PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED SOYBEAN OIL, SPICES, NATURAL FLAVOR, BROWNED IN PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED SOYBEAN OIL). BARBECUE SAUCE: HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP, WATER, TOMATO PASTE, DISTILLED VINEGAR, WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE [DISTILLED VINEGAR, MOLASSES, CORN SYRUP, WATER, SALT, CARAMEL COLOR, GARLIC POWDER, SUGAR, SPICES, TAMARIND, NATURAL FLAVOR, SULFITING AGENT], MODIFIED FOOD STARCH, SALT, POTASSIUM CHLORIDE, MUSTARD FLOUR, SOYBEAN OIL, CORN SYRUP SOLIDS, NATURAL SMOKE FLAVOR, XANTHAN GUM, CARAMEL COLOR, SODIUM BENZOATE [PRESERVATIVE], GARLIC POWDER, SUGAR, SPICES, DRIED SOY SAUCE [FERMENTED WHEAT AND SOYBEANS, SALT, MALTODEXTRIN, CARAMEL COLOR], PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED VEGETABLE OIL (COTTONSEED AND SOYBEAN), TAMARIND, NATURAL FLAVOR. CHEDDAR BAKED SNACK CRACKERS: ENRICHED FLOUR (WHEAT FLOUR, NIACIN, REDUCED IRON, THIAMINE MONONITRATE [VITAMIN B1], RIBOFLAVIN [VITAMIN B2], FOLIC ACID), SOYBEAN OIL, CHEDDAR CHEESE (MADE FROM CULTURED MILK, SALT, AND ENZYMES), PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED COTTONSEED OIL, SALT, AUTOLYZED YEAST EXTRACT, LEAVENING (BAKING SODA, YEAST), MONOSODIUM GLUTAMATE (FLAVOR ENHANCER), ANNATTO EXTRACT (VEGETABLE COLOR), PAPRIKA, SODIUM CASEINATE, LACTIC AND ACETIC ACIDS, SPICES, MALTED BARLEY FLOUR. ARTIFICIALLY FLAVORED FRUIT ROLL: SUGAR, CORN SYRUP, WHEAT FLOUR, HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP, PARTIALLY HYDROGENATED SOYBEAN OIL, CITRIC ACID, MALIC ACID, SODIUM CITRATE, CELLULOSE GUM, GLYCERINE, ARTIFICIAL FLAVORS, ARTIFICIAL COLOR (RED 40). TROPICAL PUNCH ARTIFICIAL FLAVOR SOFT DRINK: SUGAR, FRUCTOSE, CITRIC ACID (PROVIDES TARTNESS), CONTAINS LESS THAN 2% OF NATURAL AND ARTIFICIAL FLAVOR, ASCORBIC ACID (VITAMIN C), VITAMIN E ACETATE CALCIUM PHOSPHATE (PREVENTS CAKING), ACESULFAME POTASSIUM AND SUCRALOSE (SWEETENERS), ARTIFICIAL COLOR, RED 40, BLUE 1, BHA (PRESERVES FRESHNESS).Size: 6 OZ

Now, I would argue that this is not food. This is a chemistry experiment or a soil sample taken from a decades-old landfill. What is outrageous about a list of dozens upon dozens of ingredients assembled inside a single serving of processed food is not that it has been dubbed a "Smart Choice," but that it exists at all.

After despairing at the realities of such revolting information, it was time to make a smart choice of our own. As a tiny act of protest, Jane and I set about creating a meal from scratch that would incorporate only a handful of ingredients, as basic as possible, organic and local, and richly flavored. A photo for homemade Sardinian pasta in my Culinaria Italy cookbook caught our eyes - only durum wheat semolina, salt and a pinch of saffron required.

We've never before tried to make our own pasta from scratch, and with a little elbow work from Jane, our kitchen was soon filled with long strips of moist pasta dough.

These were then broken off into smaller shell shapes.....

...then pressed flat, and rolled over the prongs of an ordinary kitchen fork to produce the distinctive malloreddus pasta grooves.

After drying and hardening, we boiled them in water just as you would any store-bought pasta. At Jane's urging, we spurned the jar of Ragu pasta sauce in the pantry and set about creating our own from scratch. With olive oil, garlic, onions, plenty of ripe organic tomatoes, white wine, and minced anchovy, it only took twenty minutes to concoct a rich, thick gravy on the stove top. We tossed the two together and sprinkled feta over the top....

...and sat down to an amazingly flavorful meal that was even tastier than the bottle of malbec we popped open.

It's too bad that our meal could never be awarded the much-coveted "Smart Choices" label. I'm afraid we could only incorporate about a dozen ingredients into our creation, rather than the industry-preferred seventy-five. I couldn't find a way to attach a cartoon character or a catchy jingle to the side of the bowl we served it in. And I completely failed to include such essential ingredients as high fructose corn syrup or red dye-40. So, we were unable to meet any of the requirements for healthy eating as according to the world of agribusiness. On the other hand, I'm pretty sure our pasta with tomato sauce was better for us than a donut. So perhaps it was a smart choice after all.